WINSTON WEEKLY©[1]

November 30, 2025

Vol. 3, No. 48

GIVING GRACE[2]

What exactly does it mean to “give grace?” Donna Leigh described it in part as “[T]o look under the surface and even if I do not understand or agree, to apply grace, consideration, thoughtfulness and love. The reasons someone does something, the background they come from, the illness they have, the circumstances they live in may not be our own, but we can offer grace.”

Lisa Bronner wrote that giving grace sometimes means asking for help, citing Charles Mackesy’s book, The Boy, The Mole, The Fox and the Horse. “There is no wisdom in declining help when we clearly need it. There is no virtue in going it alone, floundering and thrashing about, when help is readily available. For one thing, it’s inefficient. … Sometimes help doesn’t even come in a form we want. But it is there nonetheless, and we are foolish not to recognize it.”

The perspectives of Donna and Lisa are worth considering. How many times have we thought someone was rude or mean and not considered whether they were going through a difficult moment or season? While I do not excuse rudeness or meanness, I have engaged in my fair share of such behavior, usually because I am stressed, sleep-deprived, or both. Although I do not expect, nor usually want someone to ask what is wrong, I appreciate those who have given me grace. I have also tried, on reflection, to apologize and express my gratitude for giving me grace.

How many times have we refused help, even when we needed it most? I have foolishly resisted help more often than I care to admit. Whether it was growing up in a neighborhood of twelve boys and no girls or engaging in the rigors of farm life from a young age, I refused help time and again, well into adulthood. On reflection, my foolishness has cost me meaningful moments and added to stress I now try so hard to avoid.  

WEEKLY ACTIVITY

Discuss with a close friend or family member what grace means to you and to them. Write down five words, starting with each letter in the word grace, reflective of what you can do to give someone grace, and what you can do to give yourself grace.

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[1] A Sunday newsletter and blog by Alysen Bayles to be shared with the appropriate attribute.

[2]Resources: Donna Leigh, Living & Growing: What does giving grace mean?, June 16, 2022, Juneau Empire, www.juneauempire.com; Going Green with Lisa Bronner, Giving Ourselves Grace, Jan. 22, 2024, www.lisabronner.com.